I sit down to eat at my family's seder
and smile when I think how this room will smell later
I'll have a big bowl of that matzoh ball soup
And a bite of that egg will soon make me poop
I'm preparing to fart and my family knows it
So pass me that shank bone and the spoiled charoset
Give me those herbs, so tasty and bitter
I haven't got time to run to the shitter
And so I let loose, my grandma's disgusted
I smell like a sewer and my underwear's crusted
I've always had trouble with kosher digestion
My presence inevitably begs a fifth question
'Who farted in here? Toots, was that you?'
But they know it was, I'm the mad farting Jew
But there's something I do that just might surprise ya
I fart once for the room and once more for Elijah